The Dark Side of Loving Your Work
“Find a job you enjoy doing, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” -Mark Twain
Mark Twain was a smart dude. He was also a fairly famous writer whose work is respected by many. But his quote, “Find a job you enjoy doing, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” is 100% absolutely and unequivocally bad advice.
On it’s surface, the quote sounds fantastic. It totally makes sense, right? If you do a job you love, then it won’t feel like work. The simple fact is that sometimes no matter how much you love what you do, it’s going to feel like work.
But that’s not the real issue that I am concerned about regarding Mark Twain’s quote. My issue revolves around compartmentalization.
A couple of jobs ago in the mortgage industry, I worked for a company that no longer exists. When I worked there, I was an analyst and I mostly hated what I was doing. Admittedly, it wasn’t just the work I was doing that was a poor fit for me. The company also had a toxic culture and the industry was crashing pretty hard as well. Most days at work I was miserable. Yet, most days when I went home, I was fine.
Why? Simple.
It was only a job. I had no passion for the work I was doing. I went to work, I did my job and then I left. And every day when I walked out that door, it was like the company disappeared… at least until the next morning.
Fast forward to my last job in the industry. At that job, I loved the people that I worked with and genuinely liked parts of my job. When I had a bad day at work, I took it home more often than not. I also found myself starting to fall into the trap of always being available. Which by the way, isn’t something I ever intended but I sure stood back and allowed it happen. That said, when push came to shove, I could still find ways to turn off the work in my brain. I generally did this by focusing on my coaching or other creative endeavors.
Fast forward again to today. I’m a couple days back from vacation and I now work for myself. I do coaching, game design, and writing full time. I love almost every aspect from my job. And I’ll be honest when I say that taking time off stressed me out more than it did at any of my previous jobs.
The difference now is that I love my work because my work perfectly aligns with who I am and what I want to do in life. I want to work more than I have ever wanted to work before in my life. Which of course is a blessing but also can be a curse.
Take failure for example. When I failed at that first job on project, it only affected my work life. When I failed at my last job, it did have some effect on my home life but still, I was failing someone else. I was failing some executive at a company where I worked. When I fail now, I am failing me. And when you fail yourself it can be hard not to take it personal. Of course, the catch is that we will all fail sometimes.
When we take that failure upon ourselves it can be incredibly disheartening. It can even lead us to giving up on doing the things we love. I know over the years, I have given up on more than one venture of my own because the failure got to be too much. Heck, I still have a 75% finished novel that I promised on this blog that I would publish and I am still avoiding it. Hey, no one is perfect.
I want to be clear that I am not saying we shouldn’t do work that we love to make our living. On the contrary I think whenever possible, everyone should do what they love as their primary line of work. I simply want to prepare other for the truth: When you do what you love, you become one with your work. It’s like it binds to your work to your soul. And that can be both fulfilling and anxiety inducing.
My best advice to anyone pursuing their passion as their main line of work is twofold: First, work hard to allow your brain to take breaks. I do that by still having hobbies and passions that don’t help make me any income. There’s much less pressure with those hobbies than with my primary work.
Second, accept that you will fail— a whole bunch. The key is turning those failures into lessons that help you towards your next success.
Get out there. Live your passion. Find the work you love. Be prepared to work harder than you ever have before in your life.
-Jason